To overcome the victim mentality, we must be honest with God and ourselves about our emotional, spiritual, and possibly physical state. We also need to ask 2 important questions…
- What does the victim mentality do for me?
- Am I ready to be healed and overcome the victim mentality?
These 2 questions help to position ourselves into a place of honesty with the Lord. They open our minds, wills, and emotions up to hearing the Word of God, which brings healing. Then we can overcome the victim mentality.
Position Yourself for Healing
Something we have to understand is this: We will continue down the same path until we believe there is a better option. Until we believe that God’s destiny for our lives is better than the victim mentality, we will never make the trade.
The Lies We Believe | What Does the Victim Mentality Do for Me?
The victim mentality lie that we believe is that it somehow protects us. Somewhere in our past, we received a message to adopt a counterfeit identity of the victim. Then we will have protection from rejection.
As we knowingly or unknowingly go down this trail, we are drawn to people who will validate this mindset.
If no one in our lives challenges to renew our minds with the truth, then we stay stuck in this mindset, never receiving the breakthrough God has for us.
The Bible doesn’t say that having a victim mentality will protect us. The Bible says this…
- “But the Lord is faithful, who will establish you and guard you from the evil one.”—2 Thessalonians 3:3
Jesus Asked a Question That Will Help You Overcome the Victim Mentality
In John 5, Jesus heals a man in the pool of Bethesda who had been sick for 38 years. He asked him, “Do you want to be made well?”
“Now a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, ‘Do you want to be made well?’
“The sick man answered Him, ‘Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; but while I am coming, another steps down before me.’
“Jesus said to him, ‘Rise, take up your bed and walk.’ And immediately the man was made well, took up his bed, and walked.”—John 5:5-9 (emphasis added)
Reading this passage without a teachable heart, you might think Jesus was sarcastic with his question. Look closer. Jesus is asking a crucial question, confronting the spirit of victimization head-on.
The victim mentality, or spirit of victimization, finds a way to skirt around Jesus’s question. It still does this today.
The man gives an immediate excuse for why he wasn’t healed. It’s as if the man is saying, “Circumstances just don’t work out for me. Someone is always getting in the way of my breakthrough.”
Do you feel this way? Perhaps the victim mentality has taken root.
The question Jesus is asking has a yes or no answer. We can identify the victim mentality as one that gives excuses.
Jesus said, “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’” (Matthew 5:37). This principle applies to more than the victim mentality, but it certainly speaks to the spirit of victimization.
The question is, do we want to be well. How we answer determines the next steps. If we’re going to be healed and receive a breakthrough of freedom, we say “Yes!” This moves us into a position of responsibility to follow God’s instructions.
Jesus is asking the man if he is ready to get up and move on from where he had been and follow a new way of living. This requires responsibility on his part to respond to God’s invitation of a new identity.
God always leads us to repent, forgive, and adopt a new way of thinking.
Overcome the Victim Mentality | Repentance and Forgiveness
In order to start moving from victim to victor, a repentant heart is necessary. There must be a turning away from the mindset that someone, or yourself, has the power to protect you. Instead there must be a time of deep reflection and repentance that protection comes from God.
Secondly, choose to forgive. You may have heard it said, “Forgiveness is not a feeling, it’s a choice.” This is true. Forgiveness sets you free. It takes away the power from the circumstances of your past. Those circumstances are what the enemy holds over you, condemning, shaming, and guilting you into holding on to grudges.
The grudges grow roots of bitterness and doubt, ultimately holding you hostage in the past instead of moving toward the breakthrough of your future.
Overcome the Victim Mentality | Meditate on the Word of God
Repentance, forgiveness, and God’s Word renews our minds and changes our perspective. Repentance and forgiveness clear out the “garbage” in our minds, wills, and emotions and makes room for God’s truth to take root.
Read these verses. Meditate on them. Ask God to plant them like seeds in your heart, to water them daily with His Spirit of Truth, and grow them to produce an abundant harvest—a victorious life!
- “But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”—1 Corinthians 15:57
- You’ve been given a life of victory through Jesus.
- “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.”—2 Corinthians 10:4-6
- When cynical, doubtful, or blaming thoughts enter your mind, bring them into captivity and declare that God has given you freedom. That they do not control you; you are a slave to Christ (see 1 Corinthians 7:22).
- “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.”—Hebrews 4:12
- When there is confusion in the heart, ask the Spirit to reveal what the enemy wants to keep hidden from you. Ask the Lord to discern your thoughts and surrender them to Him.
- “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord.”—Romans 12:17-19
- When we have to use wisdom when we are tempted with a vengeance mindset. The victim mentality can use vengeance as a license to go against the God’s instruction. Pride enters here, and we know that pride comes before the fall.
We must leave the wrath for God. It is our job to take responsibility for our actions. If we want peace, we must sow peace.
This does not mean that hurtful things from our past will go unnoticed by the Lord. It means that you surrender the situation to Him and allow His plans to prevail, not ours.
Are you struggling to overcome the victim mentality?
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